Repeat after me: S-S-S-S-S.

Well, I've done it. 
I've just knowingly typed an "ly" adverb after a dialog tag. It couldn't be helped.

-->

"Shut the door. Leave me alone," I say, pitifully.

I honestly tried to use another verb, but I'd already used it two paragraphs later. 
And you know how much editors hate that "echo" thing.

The pitifully just worked. For the rhythm, the tone, the situation. So I'm leaving it.

But I do it knowing that it worked for that dialog tag. And I hope all of you writers out there are doing the same. Making choices that work, that sound right when read aloud. And that don't echo themselves throughout your chapters.

Now, get ready for my Personal Peeve.

I'm reading a very good book. Well-plotted, an unusual place, time, heroine.
Twists and turns. In fact, close to a page-turner.

And no, I'm not telling you the title.
Because these little dialog tags are irritating the heck out of me.

"Quiet," he hissed.

A few pages later:
"We aren't supposed to be talking," he hissed.

"Don't say anything," I hissed in his ear.

"..., then walk away," I hissed.

Not to pick on that author, because plenty of writers use dialog tags that don't seem to work. IMHO. (Then again, everything on this blog is just my opinion.)

But this HISSING thing is

-->giving me a hissy fit.  really bothersome.

Others agree. 

http://bigother.com/2011/04/28/on-the-mistake-of-blindly-following-the-leader/

Though if you read the comments to this blogpost, you'll see that not everybody agrees. 

It's worth clicking over to that link, above, just to see the hilarious cartoon, which I'd love to use but think is copyrighted. Oh well. Just go. I'll wait.

Okay, thanks for coming back to this very intellectual rant about HISSING your dialog. 

Check out what the folks at Absolute Water Cooler say.

Click here to join that discussion, if you'd like.

A few there contend that it's okay to HISS, even if there's not an S in sight.

If I've now confused you about dialog tags, check out some basic facts:

NJ SCBWI guru, Kathy Temean has a simple explanation of dialog tags on her blog.  

CLICK to go there.

And I almost hate to lead you here, but remember the storm I kicked up a while back when I posted my SAID IS DEAD post? 
Yep. That's what some teachers seem to want kids to learn.  

You can read that rumpus HERE.

And before I stir up another can of hissing snakes, yes, I write for kids.  

(aside: That book mentioned above, full of hissed un-hissable sentences was a Young Adult novel, historical fiction.) 

So maybe the rules are different for other genres. 
And I know RULES ARE MEANT TO BE BROKEN. 

If you write well, you can bend, crack, stretch the rules.

But I still can't see HISSING quiet sentences with no ssssssss sounds.

At least not more than once in a while. 

If you're still reading, I'll leave you with one last link.

http://blog.nathanbransford.com/2007/05/he-said-she-shouted-loudly.html

End of rant. Back to work now.

Feel free to comment. Stir up that pot, please. Hiss away.

Said -- Still Not Dead?

Today I'm minding my own business, pulling my hair over revisions, using my beloved Scrivener, concentrating madly.

Till I decided to use the Scrivener dictionary/ thesaurus tab. I guess I must have been searching SAY, though for the life of me, five long hours later, I can't think why.

But this appeared:
 word notes!

say, said
While most writing can be improved by choosing strong and precise nouns, adjectives, and verbs, this isn't always so. When reading a novel's dialogue, we should be paying attention to what the characters say, and learn about their feelings through their words. But too many young authors overstress the verbal markers of back-and-forth speech. So we read Frank replied or Frank riposted or even Losing his temper, Frank violently expostulated. Much of the time a careful writer can set up the rhythm of a conversation so that it's always clear who's speaking and with what degree of passion. If more precise identification is needed, a simple Frank said will usually suffice, the weak and common verb scarcely intruding on the give-and-take on the page.
— MD
Conversational, opinionated, and idiomatic, these Word Notes are an opportunity to see a working writer's perspective on a particular word or usage.


Just for fun, I posted the above in my status on Facebook.
Hey, I needed a little diversion from all the very hard work I'd been doing all day.

And boy-howdie! I got some reaction from my writer friends.

Almost two years ago, I'd blogged on the subject, here:

http://ascattergood.blogspot.com/2011/04/he-said-she-said.html

You really should read what some extremely talented writers had to say in the comments.

Much of this controversy stems from writing lessons for students advocating the use of synonyms for said.

Two years later, the topic still excites and infuriates.
What say/ announce/ yell/ explain endlessly/ blab/ question/ sigh/ hiss/ SAY you?

Said is NOT Dead

Part 2, a continuation...

You know how once you start noticing something, it seems to be everywhere you look?

That's what happened today with SAID as a dialogue tag. I'd been reading a perfectly good middle grade historical novel. The debut author has received praise and glowing reviews. I actually love the story, so far. But today, I had to put it aside until I get this whole SAID thing out of my head.

Here are a few of her dialogue tags, from a random opening of two consecutive pages:
Instead of said, the (fairly young, I think) author has written

stormed
snorted
cried
murmured

And actually that's just under two pages, because it's the beginning of a chapter.
The funny thing is, I really didn't notice when I picked the book up last week. Today? Couldn't help it.

So maybe that was just those pages. I'll check two more:
explained
went on
asked (ok, that's no big deal)
added
And three saids on those pages.

There are also a lot of LY adverbs. I'm not talking about using these words in description or interior monologue or anything other than pure dialogue tags. Hmm.

Are there editors out there who are suggesting these revisions? Because this book was from a major publisher. So maybe this is the new trend, and not just with school kids. Maybe this young writer went to school in a Said Is Dead school district? They're all over the place. A quick google will turn up a whole boatload of lists, lesson plans, books-- you name it.

Maybe I'm missing something.

He Said, She Said

My fingers tremble as I write this. I'm almost afraid to open this debate. Do I dare?

But, fellow writers, do you know there's a move underfoot to teach young writers the importance of using dialogue tags other than SAID????

Okay, I know there are exceptions to every writing rule. But, especially for young readers, the dialogue tag "said" is mostly best. Not exclusively, perhaps. But mostly.

Characters hissing and pouting and grumpily saying their lines-- this so goes against my grain.

I have Darcy Pattison's book Novel Metamorphosis open in front of me this morning:

"The actual words of the character should already reflect tone, emotion attitude."

In other words, SAID is just fine. Perhaps if used exclusively, it would get boring. Mix it up maybe? But do not overdo the adverbs attached to your SAIDs either.

Pattison goes on: "Also, avoid adverbs and present participles."
ex: She said quaintly.
He said, gently scratching his nose.

(OK, I do that last one a lot, she types, reading along with the book. I'm working on it, but it doesn't bother me so much.)

Pattison goes on to say that these work occasionally but don't let them become a habit.
But I agree it's often better to "omit the action or use a separate sentence with the action more direct or more interesting."

And Anita Nolan, another very wise blogger/ editor, re: revising:

Look at the dialogue tags. Stick to "he/she said" for most tags. Use beats (actions) when possible to eliminate a tag. For example. instead of:
      "Shut the window!" she yelled.
      Try
      "Shut the window!" Her shrill voice ricocheted around the room.       
Or:       
       "Shut the window!" She crossed the room and slammed it closed herself.
 
     •    Eliminate adverbs when possible. Search and destroy "-ly" words.

So, teachers, please. Do not over-emphasize the dialogue tags.
No to HISSED, especially. It's hard to hiss a simple declarative sentence with no ssss sounds in it.

I'm not even bothering to put up a link to this movement: "Said is Dead." But it's out there. Google it and you will get lesson plans, tips, serious attempts to rid the world of SAID. A writer friend tells me she's received letters from students, re-writing her award-winning novels using different verbs for said. 

I envision the next generation of books for kids, written by these very same youngsters studying this movement. They are filled with dialogue that is hissed, spit, sighed, giggled, cried sadly, laughed loudly...